Happy Howl-o-ween!

Happy Halloween! Well, almost. It's the last day of September, so, unless we're in Bizarro World, that means tomorrow's October 1st. (If we were in Bizarro World, then tomorrow would be September 29. Or possibly August 1st.) I like October. In some parts of the country, it means that the leaves change color. Here, it... Continue Reading →


Crappy lines 2

It's harder to write a bad opening line than I thought. I take this as a good sign. Here are two more lines I wrote for the Bulwer-Lytton contest. I wrote these in Taco Bell; I wonder what sort of output I could expect from McDonald's or Burger King? "His penis was like a throbbing... Continue Reading →

Crappy lines to crappy novels

. . .  when I came across the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest in a back issue of Writer's Digest. (www.bulwer-lytton.com) The contest is sponsored by the English department at San Jose State University, and it challenges entrants to write godawful opening lines to possible godawful novels. The "dark and stormy" line was originally penned by Edward George Bulwer-Lytton,... Continue Reading →

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